For many of us, this is a time of year we least enjoy; with its long evenings, grey days and the aftermath of post-Christmas deflation—add to this anything unexpected, such as being made redundant, the break up of a relationship or death of a loved one-- and we begin to wonder what we have to feel positive about for the rest of the year.

Have you ever wondered how it is that some people always seem to remain positive no matter what befalls them and yet others, (and that may well be you), fall effortlessly into a spiral of self-doubt, anxiety and despair, when an unexpected situation occurs.

This month we are looking at beliefs; I’m not talking about religious beliefs but those beliefs we hold about ourselves and our capabilities based on our experiences of life which internally guide us to form our own versions of the reality around us.

Thoughts for the month: No one can make you feel inferior without your consent Roosevelt Whatever you think you can or think you can’t, either way, you are right. Henry Ford The things you regret in life are usually not the things you did do but the things you didn’t. Anonymous Like to contribute ...? I am interested in all feedback and comments to this newsletter. I also welcome any offers of   collaboration or inclusion  of promotional articles. To discuss any contribution   please contact me through  the channels below. My contact details Pavlenka Small Small Steps 2 Success Tel : 01206 299073 pav@smallsteps2success.co.uk     Email contact form here

Let me share a story with you. ..... A 17 year old Australian was being interviewed about his work on the streets of Sydney, helping homeless people try to make a new life and get employment. Both his parents were alcoholics and drug addicts and the interviewer asked:- ‘Considering your difficult background, it’s surprising you didn’t end up as one of the people you are trying to help due to your upbringing. You maybe had no choice?’ The young man replied:- ‘Throughout my difficult upbringing, my parents were often comatose and not there for me. A next-door neighbour was very kind to me and showed me that there could be a different reality. I realised I had a choice; it wasn’t my fault, these were simply my circumstances.’ We are all survivors of many things but we don’t need to hang onto past experiences to dictate what we believe we can and can’t achieve now and in the future. We often subconsciously believe that events and childhood experiences control our lives and shape who we are today and what we can or can’t achieve in the future. However, it’s not the events of our lives that make us who we are but our beliefs as to what these events mean. We think our beliefs are formed by our experiences but equally, our experiences are the RESULT of our beliefs. This means we can actually choose our beliefs! Do any of these statements ring true with you? - I’m not good enough therefore I can’t ..... - I’m not clever enough so I won’t be able to ..... - I don’t deserve happiness which is why I ..... If you can identify with the above or similar self-limiting beliefs, ask yourself on what basis do you have these states of mind that have become your reality. Where is the proof? If you would like to learn more, why not invest an hour of your time in a complementary coaching session. [Contact details opposite] Also this month I have prepared a set of questionnaire based on self limiting beliefs as a free download. Click the following link :  20  Self - Limiting Beliefs Why not print this off and take yourself off somewhere quiet where you won’t be interrupted, consider your responses and even write them down: As an addendum why not also consider : What could be a different way of believing and thinking?   What am I hiding behind that keeps me from feeling totally content with myself and my world?   If I change my beliefs, how will it change my life?   Until next month, with the promise of warmer days and Spring flowers

Small Steps to Success February 2010 Newsletter. Pavlenka Small. Small Steps 2 Success. 2 Elm Cottages. Mission Lane. East Bergholt. Colchester. Essex. CO7 6XH.